The holidays are both wonderful and sometimes stressful (ok, almost always stressful) and a perfect time to give yourself a personal gift of Asset-Based Thinking. One of Kathy’s colleagues at The Cramer Institute, Dr. Peggy Guest, was interviewed by Patricia Corrigan of the St. Louis Post Dispatch for an article entitled “Five Sure-fire Ways To Make Your Days Merry and Bright” . The article ran last December and I couldn’t think of a better time to serve up some of Peggy’s great holiday cheer and advice. The basic premise of Peggy’s advice is that, while Holiday’s are steeped in tradition (doing the same thing, the same way year after year), being wedded to all aspects of tradition may in and of itself be a source of stress. Makes sense. Hence, Peggy’s advice to make Change part of your Holiday.
“Over the years, we have likely accumulated a number of traditions that might begin to feel more like obligations than pleasurable giving. It may be time to let go of some old traditions in a positive way.”
Here are some excerpts from the article and Peggy’s ABTips for the Holidays:
CHANGE YOUR GIFT-GIVING
Time is everyone’s most precious commodity. Suggest to dear friends that instead of exchanging gifts, you’ll meet for a drink, for lunch or for a movie over the holidays or (even better) afterward.
“Most of our friends want the best for us, just as we want that for them. When we explain that we hope to make the holidays lighter for ourselves and for those around us, our friends are likely to understand and to give us their blessing.”
CHANGE YOUR DECORATING SCHEME
Do more, do less, do it differently. Remember that the less time you spend decorating the more time you have to spend with family and friends.
CHANGE YOUR HOLIDAY MEAL
Food and family meals are perhaps some of the most important and treasured parts of the Holidays. Try changing roles, sharing recipes and favorite dishes, and really noticing everything that you and others do to bring those great holiday meals to life.
“One way to reduce stress is to appreciate the things we did for our loved ones in the past — and then consider what image we would like to have of ourselves this holiday season. Most of us have an image of the people to whom we provide holiday giving. We see them as needing, expecting and anticipating whatever it is we will give them. Our images are usually a little overdrawn.”
CHANGE YOUR LIGHT FILTER
“The basic values inherent in the celebrations this time of year might be faith-based or seasonal. The image of the Winter Solstice is that the world moves from dark to light, from the shortest day of the year to the longest. Most of the faith-based celebrations go back to that very ancient image.”
LIGHTEN UP
Finally, Peggy’s last bit of de-stressing holiday advice is to take a few minutes to think about how we lighten the lives of others and how others lighten our lives.
“Just thinking about that can put us in a good frame of mind to help us feel pleasure — and not distress — at this time of year.”
Happy Holidays.
Hank Wasiak
